Saturday, February 14, 2009

Black and White - Under 40? You won't understand.

My friend Larry sent this to me and I liked it so much I thought I'd blog it. The point is to help remember that life's most simple pleasures are very often the best.

You could hardly see for all the snow,
Spread the rabbit ears as far as they go.
Pull a chair up to the TV set,
'Good Night, David. Good Night, Chet.'

My Mom used to cut chicken, chop eggs and spread mayo on the same cutting board with the same knife and no bleach, but we didn't seem to get food poisoning.

My Mom used to defrost hamburger on the counter AND I used to eat it raw sometimes, too. Our school sandwiches were wrapped in wax paper in a brown paper bag, not in ice-pack coolers, but I can't remember getting e.coli.

Almost all of us would have rather gone swimming in the lake instead of a pristine pool (talk about boring), no beach closures then.

The term cell phone would have conjured up a phone in a jail cell, and a pager was the school PA system.

We all took gym, not PE and risked permanent injury with a pair of high top Ked's (only worn in gym) instead of having cross-training athletic shoes with air cushion soles and built in light reflectors. I can't recall any injuries, but they must have happened because they tell us how much safer we are now.

Flunking gym was not an option, even for stupid kids! I guess PE must be much harder than gym.

Speaking of school, we all said prayers and sang the national anthem, and staying in detention after school caught all sorts of negative attention.

We must have had horribly damaged psyches. What an archaic health system we had then. Remember school nurses? Ours wore a hat and everything.

I thought that I was supposed to accomplish something before I was allowed to be proud of myself.

I just can't recall how bored we were without computers, Play Station, Nintendo, X-box or 270 digital TV cable stations.

Oh yeah ... and where was the Benadryl and sterilization kit when I got that bee sting? I could have been killed!

We played 'king of the hill' on piles of gravel left on vacant construction sites, and when we got hurt, Mom pulled out the 48-cent bottle of Mercurochrome (kids liked it better because it didn't sting like iodine did) and then we got our butt spanked. Now it's a trip to the emergency room, followed by a 10-day dose of a $49 bottle of antibiotics, and then Mom calls the attorney to sue the contractor for leaving a horribly vicious pile of gravel where it was such a threat.

We didn't act up at the neighbor's house either because if we did, we got our butt spanked there and then we got butt spanked again when we got home.

I recall Donny Reynolds from next door coming over and doing his tricks on the front step, just before he fell off. Little did his Mom know that she could have owned our house. Instead, she picked him up and swatted him for being such a goof. It was a neighborhood run amuck.

To top it off, not a single person I knew had ever been told that they were from a dysfunctional family. How could we possibly have known that?

We needed to get into group therapy and anger management classes? We were obviously so duped by so many societal ills that we didn't even notice that the entire country wasn't taking Prozac! How did we ever survive?



Bob said...

Connecting the dots, one-by-one, it all makes sense - using circular logic. QED. ;)

Noons said...

Great post, Karen!

My kids are always immensely shocked and surprised when I explain the first time I watched tv I was already 16 years old, back in 1970: never lived anywhere near one until then.

And it didn't make the slightest difference: we enjoyed and entertained ourselves as much or more than they do.

Unknown said...

My mother used to let us out the door after breakfast when we were 5, 6, 7 to create our own play fun in the woods and fields nearby. The only rule was to come home for lunch or dinner when she blew her whistle.

Jerry C said...

We were from the "Hydrogen Peroxide" camp rather than Mercurochrome. Between the two, though, you could fix anything.

Joel Garry said...

I'll spare you, but for every one of those, and a lot more (you missed seat belts!), I can give an example of someone I know personally who got really messed up. I grew up in "the Wonder Years" (laughing especially hard when they showed things specific to LA, like the tunnel under LAX).

These are the good old days. You just aren't remembering the bad.

Oh, and the Prozac - see "Mad Men."